We Fall Down!

I fell the other day, which isn’t unusual for me, but I was all alone and I fell HARD! There were people within earshot but I didn't call out to them, and even though everything I was carrying crashed to the floor no one seemed to hear the commotion. So, I just lay there for a moment, one shoe on and one off, pain searing through my knee and arm and feeling a little bit embarrassed. I mean, really!  Who falls off the very last step and nearly breaks their neck?  Me!  After I got my pride in check, I slowly began to lift myself up so that I could limp my way on to my destination.  I left most of what I was carrying on the floor, because at that moment, it wasn’t important so I gathered only what I needed. Anything else would have been extra weight that I couldn’t handle.

My friend, in life, we all fall—HARD! And often we are either in too much pain, or we’re too embarrassed to cry out for help. What is important is that when you fall, you don’t stay there!  Get back up, brush yourself off and limp, crawl or hobble your way on to your destination.

The next day, I had plenty of proof that I had been hurt.  I had a bruised, swollen knee, swollen ankle and my pinkie toe hurt like a dickens!  Did I mention that there were spikes on my shoes and one dug deep into my foot?  Falling, failure, fights, almost always leave evidence that we’ve encountered them, whether it’s a visible scar or not, the reminder is surely there.

I want you to know that in every situation, God sees you, He’s there to help you and He will heal the pain.  All we have to do is ask Him.  When I fell, I didn’t call out for help but when I got to my destination, I sent a message to my husband and an armor bearer and they brought me what I needed and cleaned the mess of the fall.  That’s what God wants to do for you…leave the brokenness, pain, and misfortune of your failure behind.  Leave it for Him, He’ll not only clean it up, but He will also clean you up!  Rejoice in the moment, don’t lay there like the old lady in the commercial and say, “I’ve fallen and I can’t get up!”  Do like I did, when my husband came to my rescue, I leaned on him for the rest of the day.  You can lean on God for the rest of your days.  Lean, my friend…”We fall down, but we get up!”

Philippians 3:13-14—Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended it, but this one thing I do: forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.

Necessary Confrontation

When I first saw this picture I was amazed by the transformation.  I couldn’t believe my eyes.  At a point, I tipped the scale at 258! I can’t believe I just typed that.  I’ve shared before that I never struggled with my weight until after I had children; I developed thyroid disease and metabolic issues after my second baby.

As I was looking at how much I’ve changed I couldn’t believe the “me” that I used to be.  “I don’t remember being this fat, I look so sad” is all I could say. My mother’s response was, “But you were still pretty.”  I started thinking…why didn’t my husband, my mother or my friends say anything to me about how much weight I had gained, and why didn’t they insist that I go back to the doctor?

While I recognize that no one could make me go to the doctor, I was curious as to why no one said to me...  “Enough is enough!” It struck me--we do the same thing as Christians. We can clearly see someone going down a path that isn’t good for them, yet fear, intimidation and the possibility of alienation prevents us from being truthful with those we love…that niece whose clothes have become a little too revealing, the nephew who has become distant, your son or daughter whose grades are slipping.  What about our friends and loved ones whose lives seem to be spinning out of control and the only thing we seem to be able to say is “you’re still pretty.” 

I understand that my mom didn’t want me to be self-conscious and become even more depressed but the bigger I got, the sicker I became—heart issues, knee pain, and host of other things that were cured in the first 15 pounds I lost.  It’s good for us to encourage others and quietly pray for them but the scripture tells us that sometimes confrontation is good.  Take a look at 2 Timothy 3:16—“All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness…”  As believers, we have a responsibility to help those we see going astray in a loving and kind way.

How much further along in my trek to healthier living could I have been if someone had confronted me in love and said—“Ok, enough is enough…let’s get to a doctor and find the real problem?”  I want to encourage you to reach out to someone for whom you have been praying.  It just may be the “shot in the arm” they need.

Today’s Prayer:

Father in Heaven, thank you for those around me, now who help me keep “short accounts” with You, so that I am able to stay on the path that You have predestined just for me.  I pray that You will give me the wisdom, insight and loving hand that I need to help guide someone to the path that you have for them.  Remind me daily that “words fitly spoken are like apples of gold in pictures of silver. (Prov. 25:11) 

In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Necessary Waiting

I despise waiting.  Like, seriously! I can shop for hours in a department store searching for the perfect dress, or shoes, or accessories, or fragrance…I’m digressing—sorry.  I dislike waiting so much that even after hours of searching for the perfect “thing” if the line is too long, I’ll leave everything right there and go home.  That sounds terrible, but it’s true.

Recently, my ability to wait patiently was tested.  My mother and I went to have our annual mammograms together, on a Friday afternoon and by that following Tuesday morning I had received two calls from the radiology department.  The second called revealed that there was an “undetermined mass” in my left breast and that I needed to return for subsequent exams that would take hours to complete.  Although I needed further testing, I couldn’t get an appointment until the next Tuesday.  Immediately, the wheels in my head started turning.  I have cancer, something is wrong, my emotions ran the gamut.  As you can imagine, my next thought was about the “wait.”  An entire week to wait, fret and worry. I hate waiting.

I learned something that week.  I can wait, and patiently, might I add.  Don’t misunderstand me; there were moments that I felt like pulling my blond hair out by its gray roots.  Seven days…there were moments when my nerves were like a tightly wound clock…tick, tick, tick!  But then, I would hear the voice of the Lord say, “wait patiently,” and a sense of calm would wash over me.  The Bible says in Isaiah 40:31—“They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run and not be weary; and they shall walk and not faint.”

Sometimes, beloved, we have no choice but to wait. And while we wait on the LORD to answer our prayers, we must learn to find strength in Him.  Waiting can be difficult, especially when there is an unknown factor involved.  I promise, if you wait on Him, you'll never wait in vain.

Our Prayer:

Dear Lord, please help me to rest in Your presence and trust in Your plan for my life.  Keep me on the path that will help me to lay down my will for Yours.  Finally, God, I thank You for allowing me to see Your perspective instead of my own.  In Jesus’ Name,

Amen.   

Real Love

When I was expecting my oldest, my son, I was amazed by the bond that we created while he was still growing inside me. When he was restless and bouncing unmercifully, I soon learned that when I sang to him, he would grow still. It was that way even after he was born. As a baby I could sing the silliest of songs and it would lull my baby boy to sleep.

When I learned that I was expecting baby Kerrington, I went into a panic! I had so much love for Kevin that I was uncertain how well I would be able to love a new baby. After miscarrying, I felt that my son had saved my sanity. He saved me, his mommy and didn't even know it. So we shared a special kind of love--my first born. I was afraid that I didn't have the capacity to love them both equally and fairly. I worried about that the entire pregnancy.

After she was born, and as we grew together, I learned that not only was I capable of loving them both completely and fully but also separately and wholly. They are the best parts of me...one with an eye for fashion, the other possesses an artistic flair. Both of them lovers, sensitive, articulate and bright. One is moody, the other is pensive and observant. Male and female, one is left-handed the other right. They are both so different and still so much the same. Both deserving of the love that only a mother can give. And I am happy to oblige them, they are my delight, my gifts from God.

My friend, this is how the Father loves us, separate but equal. We are without a doubt different in almost every way possible and still He loves us just the same. How awesome is that? As a young mother, I feared that there was not enough of my love to go around. I have found that not only do I have enough, God has graced me with more than enough. Scripture says in 1 Corinthians 13:4–8 "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails ... "

True love, be it eros (erotic love), friendship (brotherly love) or agape (divine love) is a gift from God. Embrace it, cherish and revel in it.

Here's Our Prayer:
Father in Heaven, thank You for Your love for me. And for the love that You have shown to me, through human touch. I am ever grateful that I have been loved wholly and completely. Help me to extend Your love to others, so that we may touch the world and affect them with the love of Your Son, Jesus. Amen.

Treadmill Wars...

This blog has NOTHING to do with devotionals or the spiritual trek that I've been on. This isall about this new "healthy lifestyle" I'm living. I've said in my devotionals before that after my daughter was born I had some unexplained health issues. It took over 10 years to get it right! Good grief!

But, we're here now, in a healthier place--thinner, happier and smiling broadly. Let me be very clear--I DO NOT like exercise. It isn't my favorite thing to do, hence the name of this blog. Some mornings when I wake up and walk downstairs to the freaking treadmill, I spend the first minutes just looking at it. In my head, I'm saying, "Really? Are you still here? Didn't someone have the foresight to throw you away last night?" LOL

But, here's what I've learned guys, although I still take my medication for thyroid, I don't rely on it to help me lose weight. While I can't stop taking this particular medication, I also eat differently and war with my doggone treadmill. 

As my "Bob Greene," Tierra would say, "I'm on a journey" and I'm enjoying it. As with every change in life there are highs and lows, good days and bad ones. But, take a singing lesson from my girl Latrice Pace and "Don't Give Up!" I'd like to encourage you (especially women) to invest in yourself.  Too often, we live for the past...leave it there! The 20 year old me, who was a size 10 with no stretch marks and perky boobs, she's gone! LOL! Yep, I just said that. But, I embrace the beautiful, curvaceous woman I am today. I'm a wife, a mother, a daughter, a sister and most importantly I am a woman--worthy to be celebrated and so are you!

I'm going to toss in one scripture--Psalm 139:14--I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. So girlfriend, get up! Get moving! Change your life for the better...you can do it, I believe in you, now it's your turn to believe in yourself!

Gain inspiration from these women who inspire me on a weekly basis. Visit www.tierragoesgreen.com, follow her on twitter @tierragoesgreen  or email her at TierraGoesGreen@gmail.com for the best detox you've ever experienced. It's more than worth it...don't buy a pair of shoes and invest in your health.  Also, be inspired by Latrice Pace—her journey has inspired me and her music is the soundtrack to my treadmill wars.  Check her out on twitter @latricepace and www.latricepace.com 

Living & Loving (The Fragility of Love)

I had fibroids. I also have a condition called poly-cystic ovaries syndrome. For all intensive purposes, I should not have been able to get pregnant as easily as I did without the help of doctors. However, I have two beautiful children for whom I am eternally grateful. I had a miscarriage before our son Kevin was conceived and it is believed that I had another one when he was about a year old. I say "believed" because I never went to the doctor to confirm the second miscarriage. I couldn't bare it. 

My husband is a musician and we were going from place to place in his home town promoting his first album in the fall of 1998. During one of the sets I started having excruciating abdominal pain and I remember thinking to myself that I was going to have a difficult week navigating shows, church and "womanly issues." After the shows for that day were done, we stopped at my parents hotel because we hadn't seen them. By that time, I could no longer keep my brave face on, my pain was almost unbearable. The details of how things transpired will always be a little "fuzzy" for me because I was lightheaded. To me, that bathroom was reminiscent of a scene from CSI. It was messy, gory, painful and heart breaking.

My mother and my husband didn't bat an eye. They cleaned me and the bathroom completely up and never minced words with me--a very tearful and bewildered young woman who had no idea what was really happening. That day will forever be etched in my memory, though because I experienced two kinds of love. My mom went into a fierce, mother-bear, protective kind of love that wanted to reassure me that I was okay. My husband, on the other hand, took a different approach. He upheld me with a quiet strength and never let me go until we were back in our own room, when he laid me down and let me rest. I was shaken and fearful that this would be my life during my child bearing years, afraid I'd never conceive again. 

Life and love can be just as messy as that awful day. We raise our children, build our careers, seek higher education and grow ministries. And often, living can get in the way of loving. When I asked some friends their concept of love, some gave generic answers while others had meaningful and heartfelt answers and sadly, there were a few who didn't know what to say at all. I submit that if we are not careful, the latter will be the epitaph of many marriages.

Beloved, its easy to allow ourselves to turn our backs on each other in marriage, especially when there has been damage done to the bond. We learn to live for the children or concentrate on breadwinning. The focus of passion, love, marriage...its lost.

Ephesians 5:25--Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church...I love this scripture because it speaks to us about "giving up" something for someone whom you love, just as Christ did at Calvary for us. If you find yourself in that 'living versus loving chasm' don't worry it's not necessarily irreparable. Get in the trenches and get ready to go to work--seek wise counsel, go on dates, spend time talking...it doesn't have to be too late.

Our Prayer:

Lord, You said in Your Word that it wasn't good for man to be alone. You created us to live with and love one another. Help us to remember that love and passion that we felt for one another in the beginning stages of our relationship. We want to be in Your will and find happiness in the mate that You gave to us. Amen

Soul Blinders

Webster's dictionary describes a distraction as something that prevents someone from giving full attention to something else. It also describes a distraction as a diversion.

In life we often experience many diversions, something that causes us to lose focus on the important things. Horse trainers often add blinders to the bridle of race horses because they believe these blinders keep the horse focused on what is in front of him, and encourage him to pay attention to the race rather than other distractions, such as crowds. As believers, we know that Christ and our relationship with Him, witnessing and bringing lost souls into the Family of God is our goal. But we also have to live life. And recently my life, my heart and my mind have been filled with "things". When this happens, it's difficult for me to hear God's voice. 

I had an "aha moment" sitting at my kitchen table the other morning--I felt overwhelmed and began to cry. I had no idea where the tears were coming from or why, but boy did they flow. It was at that moment that I heard the voice of The Lord, clearer than I had in months! I began to pray..."Father, I have no words to speak. Only tears to cry for this lost and lonely feeling that I have deep in my heart." He said to me, "I have been waiting for you to come back to our meeting place...good morning!" As I sat and communed with God, I knew what that longing was about. I love shoes and if I could, I would fill every empty space in my closet with a new pair (digressing...a little but stay with me). Whenever I feel a "need" in my life and I can't figure it out, eventually I go to shoes. And oh my goodness, I buy beautiful shoes! And for a moment, I have my happy back. But it never lasts longer than the time it takes for me to find the next bargain.

Friend, The Lord allowed me to see that I had been filling the void in my heart with things that would never satisfy. Spending time alone with God connects us to His Spirit, thereby allowing us the opportunity to know Him in a personal way. Only THAT can satisfy what feels like an empty chasm in our hearts. The Psalmist said it best..."As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, my God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God" (Psalm 42:1-2). 

I didn't realize that I had been attempting to fill the loneliness and longing that I felt in my heart with things, I found that my real refuge was in spending time with God. God doesn't leave us without direction or help. He gave us His Word, the Bible, to direct our thoughts, behaviors, hearts, minds and souls - to be our soul-blinders! 

Here's Our Prayer:

Father in Heaven, each of us can find a reason to do a great many things to satisfy the physicality's of loneliness and brokenness. But, we want to fill that space with You. In those awkward moments when things just don't seem to be going as planned, remind us that You are here and that You're listening, speaking and waiting patiently for us to meet with You. Thank You Lord for never turning Your back on us, even when we are not cognizant of the fact that You are there. Amen

Mirror, Mirror

“Mirror, mirror on the wall, who’s the fairest of them all…” That’s an epic line from the Disney Classic movie “Snow White.”  The Evil Queen was in a constant state of competition with her lovely step daughter, “Snow White.”

I think of that quote sometimes when I’m standing in front of a mirror. Women, spend a lot of time there. Whether it’s to admire God's handiwork or to chastise ourselves for that cookie we ate last night.   Whatever the reason, we spend a lot of time looking, tweaking, shaming, comparing. It's human nature. A friend of mine, who was "down on herself" about having gained weight and looking different than her 20 year old self, expressed her disdain to her significant other, apparently she did this more often than he cared for. She says, he told her in a conversation that he wanted her to try an exercise. He asked her to see herself through his eyes. My friend told me that the woman he described was nothing in comparison to the woman she saw in the mirror everyday. He described an exquisitely beautiful woman, which brought tears to her eyes.   Seeing herself through his eyes caused her to change her perspective and embrace the woman she had become.

Likewise, I'm reduced to tears filled with gratitude when I consider what God sees when He looks at me.   Scripture says in 2 Corinthians 5:21—“God made Him who knew no sin to be sin for us, so that in Him we might become the righteousness of God.”  Say what now?  Really?  Yes, we are the very righteousness of God and when He looks at us, He only sees Jesus!  Can you imagine?  The flaws, the guilt, the sin and shame all paid for by One beautiful Man.

My friend has vowed that from now on, when she’s feeling poorly about herself, to close her eyes and see the image that was presented to her in that exercise.  I want you, my friend, to do the same.  When you’re feeling less than worthy and not so lovely, see yourself through the eyes of God, all He sees is righteousness and His love for you.  After all, while our self-view is important, His view of us is everything!

Our Prayer:

My Savior, I am eternally grateful that You gave Your life for me.  You, a beautiful, unmarred, perfect Man took my place—flawed, scarred and tattered.   I’m humbled, awestruck and thankful beyond mere words that You thought enough of me to make such an awesome and selfless sacrifice.  Help me to be reminded that Your view of me and all of Your children is flawless and filled with love. Amen

If You're Happy and You Know It!

When I was a little girl, we used to sing a song in Sunday School—“If you’re happy and you know it clap your hands!”  It was one of the first songs I taught my children.  For some odd reason that little ditty has been ringing in my head for a few days now.

We live in uncertain times. The economy is still shaky, crime is at an all time high and the divorce rate is ever increasing.  Given all of these facts, what could we possibly have to be happy about? Author Barry Neil Kaufman believes that happiness is a choice. And to some degree, I agree with him. 

Just as we must choose to worship the LORD even in the most difficult of times, I believe that sometimes we just have to choose happiness.  So, today there are no sad stories about the darkness of depression, failed relationships or bad days.  Today, I simply want to encourage you to choose “happy.”  The dark days will come and most assuredly, we will all encounter difficulties in life.  But, I want to challenge you to choose a different path today…

When you find yourself feeling these emotions, consider these scriptures:

Sadness/Grief: Isaiah 61:3—“He gave them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for                                           mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the LORD that He might be glorified.”

Defeated: Psalm 107: 2—“Let the redeemed of the LORD say so—who He                                          has redeemed from trouble!”

Lonely/Depressed: Psalm 28:7 –“The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart                                          trusts in Him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise Him.

Let’s Pray:

Dear Jesus, I thank you for giving me joy and happiness in my life.  You said in Your Word that “laughter does good like a medicine.”  So, today I choose to focus on the joyous things in my life.  Thank you for helping me “get my happy back!”

Amen

The Big Break Up!

I’m breaking up with my past.  It has held me captive long enough. I’m going through a metamorphosis of sorts in my life, so I’m always in my own head.  Thinking, worrying, dissecting, and criticizing.  It’s what I do…I was talking with a friend recently who pointed out to me that what I may consider a physical flaw, may be beautiful to someone else.  And that gave me pause.  I have heard millions of times that “beauty is in the eye of the beholder,” my sarcastic reply is almost always, “then you need your eyes checked!”

It was at that moment that I realized that I have been holding on to the “old me”—the “me” who was younger and more attractive.  The postpartum me, who suffered with a dysfunctional thyroid couldn’t possibly be considered beautiful, she had hormonally induced acne, unexplained weight gain, and she was tired all of the time and had a bad attitude.  Her? Pretty?  Never! J  You see, until recent months my thyroid issues went misdiagnosed for years.  And for that reason I was always tired, cranky, and a host of other adjectives I’ll let my loved ones _____________ (insert here). 

What, you may be asking; does that have to do with breaking up with my past?  Friend, I’m glad you asked.  Some times as we grow older, we yearn for days gone by, when we were young, beautiful, unattached and unencumbered.  A hormonal imbalance during my second pregnancy is what caused the thyroid to malfunction at such a rapid rate. And I wasn’t ready to be turned into the old grouch that I had become.  But it was during those times of unanswered medical questions, sick and painful days that I learned to pray…and I pray I did.  I prayed that just one person in my life would walk through this with me; I prayed that God would help me to have patience with my small children and I prayed for a proper diagnosis or healing which ever came first.  It was during those times that I learned the art of intercession.

My younger-self couldn’t have cared less about prayer and fasting.  The me I am today is who God has designed me to be, and although my past has been a stepping stone for the current place on which I stand, it’s time for me to take the next step. Forgetting those things which are behind me…I press. While I want to learn from my past—mistakes, flaws and all, I don’t long to be that person anymore.  And while I may still struggle with some of the scars, flaws and imperfections that were brought on by life, I recognize now, that I am the very righteousness of Christ and when the Father looks at me, He only sees the reflection of His Son. 

Paul said it like this:  “And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into His likeness with ever-increasing glory, which come from the Lord, who is the Spirit” (2Corinthians 3:18 NIV). Reflecting the Lord’s glory!  I can’t think of any other beauty treatment that will make a woman truly beautiful.

Let’s Pray

Dear Father in Heaven, I realize that as I continue to grow in You, I am being transformed to be more like You.  Therefore, I’m breaking up with my past and I’m leaving it behind me.  Not to forget it but rather to use it as a “teachable moment” for others.  Help me to continue to press toward the mark that You have called me to.  Take away whatever needs to be taken away to reveal the beauty of You that is in my heart.  Help me to be spiritually beautiful today and always.

In Jesus’ Name…Amen.

The Dark Pit!

Though I often attempt to smile despite what difficulties I may be experiencing in my life—there are days when the darkness just doesn’t yield any light for me. I’m extremely impatient at times like this.  My fuse is short, my temper flares and I am literally “hell on heels!”  (Yes, I meant to say heels and not wheelsJ).

As believers, we like to pretend that depression isn’t a part of our vocabulary—in fact, most times mental health issues are swept under the rug.  The truth is we all struggle with something.  After the birth of our son Kevin, I was depressed for more than a year because I had never struggled with my weight before pregnancy.   It took me years to realize that because of those feelings of inadequacy, I overcompensated for everything and in every area of my life. My pace was frenetic and chaotic.  Until one day, the dam broke.  I have a vivid memory of a beautiful Sunday morning, we were leaving for church and my then, two year old daughter was walking to the car, I turned her around to take her picture and found that her dress was covered in orange juice.  I cried hysterically for at least an hour—broken dam!

It wasn’t the wet dress, or the fact that we were going to be late for church that had broken the dam for me.  I had been juggling these little balls of perfection for years—my church work, helping to care for my parents, keeping a clean house, perfectly coifed little children, trying to be a good wife and mother and attempting to launch a music career.  And that bright Sunday day, my juggling act came to a screeching halt!  My beautiful baby standing there without a care in the world, looked up at me and said, “Cup broke mommy.”  I cried even harder.  Somewhere in my mind, all of my failures had been culminated with one small issue—a broken cup.

I was broken.  I had been living in a pit of darkness, all the while groping for some semblance of light and had taught myself to pretend for everyone else that I was “walking in the light.”  I refused to allow the people around me to see that I felt fat, ugly, undesirable and at times, I even felt unworthy.  I was living in a dark pit.  If you’ve ever experienced a “dark pit” don’t try to rationalize it or hide it.  We must be willing to admit that we are struggling with this depression.  Our pride hinders our ability to be authentic. To have emotional health, we must have emotional integrity.

Part of the reason that I broke was because while I was trying so diligently to be “good enough” for everyone else, I wasn’t spending any time with God—who is more than enough.  I was tired mentally and emotionally exhausted and I had built a fortress of protection around myself in my darkness—trying desperately to conceal my depression.  The scripture says in Isaiah 50:29—“He gives power to the tired and worn out, and strength to the weak (NLT).

Don’t be afraid of the dark pit of depression, it’s a part of life.  Seek wise counsel to help you through it.  I believe in counseling—find a good Christian Counselor to help you navigate the darkness and find your way back into the light—Jesus is there, waiting for you. 

Our Prayer—

Father in Heaven, here I am—tired, broken and weak.  I’ve spent too much time with the busyness of life and trying to prove to others that I am worthy of their love and affections.  Forgive me for not finding my solace in You.  I admit my need for You!  I will stay here, in this darkness, and accept it as an opportunity to wait for You, to hear from You and to feel Your presence again.  Lord, teach me Your ways and strip me of everything that is not like You.  In Jesus’ Name…Amen.

Love & War

I’m ready to admit it, I like Tamar Braxton!  I watch the show; listened to the new single...I’m sorry, Lord, forgive your child (LOL). 

Seriously, listening to her song Love and War did get me to thinking.  I didn’t have a huge spiritual epiphany but the song title, coupled with a conversation that I’d had earlier did prompt this thought—we generally only fight the hardest, longest or the most about whom or with those we love the deepest.  I’m telling you, NO ONE can make me as angry as my husband. But by the same token, he also holds the record for making the happiest (don’t tell my daddy). 

When I think about my relationship with God over the years, it’s been a bit of a “Love and War” situation.  I know that God loves me with an unmerited, undeserved love.  I’ve done nothing to warrant His love for me and yet I receive it.  Scripture tells us in Romans 5:8—“But God shows His love for us in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” In fact, there are times when I know that He should just throw me away but, His grace invites me right back into His loving arms.  It’s kind of like a mother and her child.  As parents, we give our children advice, guidance, warnings, spankings, punishments but at the end of all of that—there is always love.  Because we want what is best for our children, we are constantly cajoling them to do what is right.  I submit, as a mom of teenagers, that the teen years are absolutely the “Love and War” years but, I digress (I do that a lot).

I have been married for nearly 17 years, and it hasn’t always been easy.  In fact, there were days when I just wanted to throw the towel in the ring and end the fight altogether.  It wasn’t worth it…the arguing, the cursing, the screaming, and the “cold wars.”  Oh yes, beloved, I have said some ungodly things in the heat of an argument!  Many days I would have liked to pack up my babies and hightail it out of there.  But it wasn’t God’s will for my life. 

In relationships, there will almost certainly always be a push and pull—a test of the will, if I may, where compromise is inevitable.  That is the nature of human relationship.  And so it is with our relationship with Christ.  Our human minds find it difficult to believe that God can love us despite our ways.  Jeremiah 17:9 says, “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?”  And we tend to view ourselves in light of that wickedness and not in the light of God’s love--thus the “push and pull” of love and war.  God isn’t at war with us; however, it is our sin nature that we war against.  I contend that until we submit fully to God’s love and His will for our lives, we will be like children who are determined to have their way—often lost, confused without purpose or a plan and headed for certain destruction; fighting a war we have no chance of winning.  Today, why not hoist up the white flag and surrender to God’s plan for your life.  With every breath that we breathe, Jesus is keenly aware of every fleshly desire, every hurting place, every burden and every wound.  He’s not avoiding us, He’s waiting…why not surrender.

Let’s Pray:

Father, I confess that I am often at war with my flesh because of what it desires.  At times, I am consumed by the darkness of my humanness and self-centeredness.  Help me to find you in the aftermath of this self-inflicted war.  And Father in Heaven, I thank you for loving me enough to wait patiently for me to find my way back to You.

In Your Son’s name,

Amen. 

So, we're well into January and this is my first blog of the year! I'm so excited about what lies ahead this year. Last year was HARD! And I'm positive more challenges lie ahead. However, I'm less worried about the challenges and more concerned with how I handle them. This is the year that I learn to lend less energy to pettiness and more to the important things in life, the ministry, my husband, my family, my loved ones, my parents...ME!

I am going to attempt to get healthy this year, live a cleaner, healthier life, strengthen my walk with God and build! Don't forget, I'll be sharing with you my health and beauty finds, fashion finds and ways to save money in every way I can! Trust me, great research is going into this, I promise!

Stay tuned, next week I'm going to be talking about the vitamin pack given to me by make-up artist, Tierra Burrell and I'm researching a skin care line as well for acne prone adults like me!

My challenge for you this week: Find one person in your life who could use your encouragement and find a small way to build them up...give them a card, buy them a small gift that would be meaningful to them, take them to lunch, just so something for that special someone!

Until next week, love yourself, love your family and don't be afraid to be you!

This is going to be fun...I think!

Hey Bloggers!

So, I'm starting on a new journey and I hope you'll join me.  On January 1st I'll be 39 years old. Whew!  I know to those older than me, you're saying that's so young and to those of you younger me, calling me..old!  LOL!!! I feel "in-between"! ;-)

Well, for me, 39 will be my new beginning.  I'm actually looking forward to turning 40 so, I want to spend the next year chronicling my journey. I have asked some friends, my make-up artist--Tierra Burrell, my personal trainer--Kimble Griffin, and my personal stylist--Bridgett Battles to join me as well, to share with us their best secrets on weight loss, healthy living, make-up, fashion and how to be glamorous on a budget and for some of my younger followers I'm hoping another stylist friend of mine Keri Crutchfield will join the party! (Yes, Lady Crutchfield, I just put you on the spot...)

Weekly, we'll talk about my weight loss, fashion tips, and health and beauty tips.  I'll also be telling you where I find the best bargains here in Atlanta on shoes (the love of my life) and accessories and other "frugalista" finds.  I will also share some worship moments with you, as I begin a new study in the word, on the subject, introduce you to my music and a lot of other fun things.

My mother and Pastor will also share the occasional devotion with us.  I hope this will be a lot of fun and that you'll invite your friends, twitter followers, FB friends, etc to go on this journey with us.

Until our next blog--

Have a great week!


www.eumikabody-griffin.com
www.makeupbytierra.com

It's Time to Move Forward

Good morning!  Armed with my favorite cup of coffee, a nutri grain bar and a clean pair of glasses, I'm ready to post my first actual real blog...cleaning house will be my exercise today, but we'll discuss my "love" for exercise another day.

Quiet as it's kept, reading and writing are my first loves, not singing...but, shhh don't tell my husband (Ike). Before I continue let me say this--whatever I write about will always be honest and true. So, whether we have 1 or 1,000 readers, I love to write...so I'll be here!  Don't leave me out here in the blogosphere alone...commune with me! :-)

A recent conversation I had with my family made me realize that we live with too much regret.  Mother's beat themselves up for not being "Suzie Homemaker," father's regret not being able to be better providers and the list goes on and on and on...

Well, I say regret no more!  It's time to move forward and learn from the past. The only problem I have with the past, is staying there.  Grow-up, move forward, learn, evolve, change...Change is GREAT!  I love it, it isn't always easy but it is good.

If  I could advise my younger self, here's what my advice would be:

Love exactly who you are--hips and all.  Don't hate your oily skin, you won't wrinkle quickly. Embrace your differences and don't be ashamed of them.  I would tell my younger self that even though you'll make mistakes, you are not defined by them, you are not defined by your failures but with God's help, you can have a good outcome.  Don't worry about gaining weight, for some, it comes with the territory--at 38, in a size 14 you'll still be catchin' 'em! :-) I would advise my younger self to recognize that, pain disappointment and hurt are a part of life, not a state of being, and that she would get over the broken heart that comes with  the loss a first love.  And that real love is often times the complete opposite of what we expect it to be...trust me on that one!  I would definitely tell my youger self to learn to be forgiven and forgiving--you're gonna' need that skill later on.  I would tell my younger self to really listen to my mother, heed her advice and watch her example.  Turns out, she really does know what she's talking about.  And lastly, I'd tell my younger self to recognize her self-worth.  That she is beautiful, smart, capable and talented. And to love God with her whole heart, in the very end, He'll become your very best friend.

Admittedly, there are some things I would really love to go back and do differently.  But, I can't, so I hope and pray that my children will learn from their father and me.  It's time to move forward, no more past regrets, no more woulda', coulda', shoulda'!  Move on! Forgive yourself and really allow yourself to be forgiven, forgive your loved ones, let go of your past.  What's done is done and there is absolutely nothing you can do to change it, we can however, create a new environment for ourselves and our families. Be a better you, he or she is in there.  And since God's mercy is new every morning, take advantage of that particular caveat and move on!

Until the next time we chat, remember designer shoes can be purchased for up to 50% off and Off Fifth and NM Last Call  but, loving yourself and those around you is absolutely free!    #totallyrandom

Expect the Unexpected

Psalm 47

Psalm 47[a]

    For the director of music. Of the Sons of Korah. A psalm.
 1 Clap your hands, all you nations;
   shout to God with cries of joy.

 2 For the LORD Most High is awesome,
   the great King over all the earth.
3 He subdued nations under us,
   peoples under our feet.
4 He chose our inheritance for us,
   the pride of Jacob, whom he loved.[b]

 5 God has ascended amid shouts of joy,
   the LORD amid the sounding of trumpets.
6 Sing praises to God, sing praises;
   sing praises to our King, sing praises.
7 For God is the King of all the earth;
   sing to him a psalm of praise.

 8 God reigns over the nations;
   God is seated on his holy throne.
9 The nobles of the nations assemble
   as the people of the God of Abraham,
for the kings[c] of the earth belong to God;
   he is greatly exalted.

A Place of Abundance

 8 Praise our God, all peoples,
   let the sound of his praise be heard;
9 he has preserved our lives
   and kept our feet from slipping.
10 For you, God, tested us;
   you refined us like silver.
11 You brought us into prison
   and laid burdens on our backs.
12 You let people ride over our heads;
   we went through fire and water,
   but you brought us to a place of abundance.
Psalm 66:8-12

I'm ready for the new place of abundance in God. How about you?

New Day!

This is the day the LORD has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it (Psalm 118:24)!  I am always grateful for the new mercies that come with a new day.  No matter what we go through in our every day trials and tribulations God in His infinite mercy has kept us.  Remember, it can always be worse.  Focus on the good.  Enjoy the rest of your day!

Follow me on Twitter

I'm trying my best to be a social butterfly...lol  Follow me @EumikaBGriffin and I'll follow you back.

Hello World!

I start my blog by saying, Thank you.  I count it an honor and a privilege that anyone would be interested in what i'd have to say. :o) That being said, Let's get this party started!  I plan on having some very interesting conversations and some entertaining posts.  These first couple of days I will be spreading the news of my blog.  Please join me in getting the word out.