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Thursday, May 8, 2014

We Fall Down!


I fell the other day, which isn’t unusual for me, but I was all alone and I fell HARD! There were people within earshot but I didn't call out to them, and even though everything I was carrying crashed to the floor no one seemed to hear the commotion. So, I just lay there for a moment, one shoe on and one off, pain searing through my knee and arm and feeling a little bit embarrassed. I mean, really!  Who falls off the very last step and nearly breaks their neck?  Me!  After I got my pride in check, I slowly began to lift myself up so that I could limp my way on to my destination.  I left most of what I was carrying on the floor, because at that moment, it wasn’t important so I gathered only what I needed. Anything else would have been extra weight that I couldn’t handle.

My friend, in life, we all fall—HARD! And often we are either in too much pain, or we’re too embarrassed to cry out for help. What is important is that when you fall, you don’t stay there!  Get back up, brush yourself off and limp, crawl or hobble your way on to your destination.

The next day, I had plenty of proof that I had been hurt.  I had a bruised, swollen knee, swollen ankle and my pinkie toe hurt like a dickens!  Did I mention that there were spikes on my shoes and one dug deep into my foot?  Falling, failure, fights, almost always leave evidence that we’ve encountered them, whether it’s a visible scar or not, the reminder is surely there.

I want you to know that in every situation, God sees you, He’s there to help you and He will heal the pain.  All we have to do is ask Him.  When I fell, I didn’t call out for help but when I got to my destination, I sent a message to my husband and an armor bearer and they brought me what I needed and cleaned the mess of the fall.  That’s what God wants to do for you…leave the brokenness, pain, and misfortune of your failure behind.  Leave it for Him, He’ll not only clean it up, but He will also clean you up!  Rejoice in the moment, don’t lay there like the old lady in the commercial and say, “I’ve fallen and I can’t get up!”  Do like I did, when my husband came to my rescue, I leaned on him for the rest of the day.  You can lean on God for the rest of your days.  Lean, my friend…”We fall down, but we get up!”

Philippians 3:13-14—Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended it, but this one thing I do: forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.

Friday, January 17, 2014

Necessary Confrontation


When I first saw this picture I was amazed by the transformation.  I couldn’t believe my eyes.  At a point, I tipped the scale at 258! I can’t believe I just typed that.  I’ve shared before that I never struggled with my weight until after I had children; I developed thyroid disease and metabolic issues after my second baby.

As I was looking at how much I’ve changed I couldn’t believe the “me” that I used to be.  “I don’t remember being this fat, I look so sad” is all I could say. My mother’s response was, “But you were still pretty.”  I started thinking…why didn’t my husband, my mother or my friends say anything to me about how much weight I had gained, and why didn’t they insist that I go back to the doctor?

While I recognize that no one could make me go to the doctor, I was curious as to why no one said to me...  “Enough is enough!” It struck me--we do the same thing as Christians. We can clearly see someone going down a path that isn’t good for them, yet fear, intimidation and the possibility of alienation prevents us from being truthful with those we love…that niece whose clothes have become a little too revealing, the nephew who has become distant, your son or daughter whose grades are slipping.  What about our friends and loved ones whose lives seem to be spinning out of control and the only thing we seem to be able to say is “you’re still pretty.” 

I understand that my mom didn’t want me to be self-conscious and become even more depressed but the bigger I got, the sicker I became—heart issues, knee pain, and host of other things that were cured in the first 15 pounds I lost.  It’s good for us to encourage others and quietly pray for them but the scripture tells us that sometimes confrontation is good.  Take a look at 2 Timothy 3:16—“All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness…”  As believers, we have a responsibility to help those we see going astray in a loving and kind way.

How much further along in my trek to healthier living could I have been if someone had confronted me in love and said—“Ok, enough is enough…let’s get to a doctor and find the real problem?”  I want to encourage you to reach out to someone for whom you have been praying.  It just may be the “shot in the arm” they need.

Today’s Prayer:

Father in Heaven, thank you for those around me, now who help me keep “short accounts” with You, so that I am able to stay on the path that You have predestined just for me.  I pray that You will give me the wisdom, insight and loving hand that I need to help guide someone to the path that you have for them.  Remind me daily that “words fitly spoken are like apples of gold in pictures of silver. (Prov. 25:11) 
In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Thursday, August 1, 2013

Necessary Waiting


I despise waiting.  Like, seriously! I can shop for hours in a department store searching for the perfect dress, or shoes, or accessories, or fragrance…I’m digressing—sorry.  I dislike waiting so much that even after hours of searching for the perfect “thing” if the line is too long, I’ll leave everything right there and go home.  That sounds terrible, but it’s true.

Recently, my ability to wait patiently was tested.  My mother and I went to have our annual mammograms together, on a Friday afternoon and by that following Tuesday morning I had received two calls from the radiology department.  The second called revealed that there was an “undetermined mass” in my left breast and that I needed to return for subsequent exams that would take hours to complete.  Although I needed further testing, I couldn’t get an appointment until the next Tuesday.  Immediately, the wheels in my head started turning.  I have cancer, something is wrong, my emotions ran the gamut.  As you can imagine, my next thought was about the “wait.”  An entire week to wait, fret and worry. I hate waiting.

I learned something that week.  I can wait, and patiently, might I add.  Don’t misunderstand me; there were moments that I felt like pulling my blond hair out by its gray roots.  Seven days…there were moments when my nerves were like a tightly wound clock…tick, tick, tick!  But then, I would hear the voice of the Lord say, “wait patiently,” and a sense of calm would wash over me.  The Bible says in Isaiah 40:31—“They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run and not be weary; and they shall walk and not faint.”

Sometimes, beloved, we have no choice but to wait. And while we wait on the LORD to answer our prayers, we must learn to find strength in Him.  Waiting can be difficult, especially when there is an unknown factor involved.  I promise, if you wait on Him, you'll never wait in vain.

Our Prayer:

Dear Lord, please help me to rest in Your presence and trust in Your plan for my life.  Keep me on the path that will help me to lay down my will for Yours.  Finally, God, I thank You for allowing me to see Your perspective instead of my own.  In Jesus’ Name,
Amen.   

Saturday, July 20, 2013

Real Love



When I was expecting my oldest, my son, I was amazed by the bond that we created while he was still growing inside me. When he was restless and bouncing unmercifully, I soon learned that when I sang to him, he would grow still. It was that way even after he was born. As a baby I could sing the silliest of songs and it would lull my baby boy to sleep.

When I learned that I was expecting baby Kerrington, I went into a panic! I had so much love for Kevin that I was uncertain how well I would be able to love a new baby. After miscarrying, I felt that my son had saved my sanity. He saved me, his mommy and didn't even know it. So we shared a special kind of love--my first born. I was afraid that I didn't have the capacity to love them both equally and fairly. I worried about that the entire pregnancy.

After she was born, and as we grew together, I learned that not only was I capable of loving them both completely and fully but also separately and wholly. They are the best parts of me...one with an eye for fashion, the other possesses an artistic flair. Both of them lovers, sensitive, articulate and bright. One is moody, the other is pensive and observant. Male and female, one is left-handed the other right. They are both so different and still so much the same. Both deserving of the love that only a mother can give. And I am happy to oblige them, they are my delight, my gifts from God.

My friend, this is how the Father loves us, separate but equal. We are without a doubt different in almost every way possible and still He loves us just the same. How awesome is that? As a young mother, I feared that there was not enough of my love to go around. I have found that not only do I have enough, God has graced me with more than enough. Scripture says in 1 Corinthians 13:4–8 "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails ... "

True love, be it eros (erotic love), friendship (brotherly love) or agape (divine love) is a gift from God. Embrace it, cherish and revel in it.

Here's Our Prayer:
Father in Heaven, thank You for Your love for me. And for the love that You have shown to me, through human touch. I am ever grateful that I have been loved wholly and completely. Help me to extend Your love to others, so that we may touch the world and affect them with the love of Your Son, Jesus. Amen.

Tuesday, July 2, 2013

Treadmill Wars...


This blog has NOTHING to do with devotionals or the spiritual trek that I've been on. This isall about this new "healthy lifestyle" I'm living. I've said in my devotionals before that after my daughter was born I had some unexplained health issues. It took over 10 years to get it right! Good grief!

But, we're here now, in a healthier place--thinner, happier and smiling broadly. Let me be very clear--I DO NOT like exercise. It isn't my favorite thing to do, hence the name of this blog. Some mornings when I wake up and walk downstairs to the freaking treadmill, I spend the first minutes just looking at it. In my head, I'm saying, "Really? Are you still here? Didn't someone have the foresight to throw you away last night?" LOL

But, here's what I've learned guys, although I still take my medication for thyroid, I don't rely on it to help me lose weight. While I can't stop taking this particular medication, I also eat differently and war with my doggone treadmill. 

As my "Bob Greene," Tierra would say, "I'm on a journey" and I'm enjoying it. As with every change in life there are highs and lows, good days and bad ones. But, take a singing lesson from my girl Latrice Pace and "Don't Give Up!" I'd like to encourage you (especially women) to invest in yourself.  Too often, we live for the past...leave it there! The 20 year old me, who was a size 10 with no stretch marks and perky boobs, she's gone! LOL! Yep, I just said that. But, I embrace the beautiful, curvaceous woman I am today. I'm a wife, a mother, a daughter, a sister and most importantly I am a woman--worthy to be celebrated and so are you!

I'm going to toss in one scripture--Psalm 139:14--I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. So girlfriend, get up! Get moving! Change your life for the better...you can do it, I believe in you, now it's your turn to believe in yourself!

Gain inspiration from these women who inspire me on a weekly basis. Visit www.tierragoesgreen.com, follow her on twitter @tierragoesgreen  or email her at TierraGoesGreen@gmail.com for the best detox you've ever experienced. It's more than worth it...don't buy a pair of shoes and invest in your health.  Also, be inspired by Latrice Pace—her journey has inspired me and her music is the soundtrack to my treadmill wars.  Check her out on twitter @latricepace and www.latricepace.com 

Living & Loving (The Fragility of Love)


I had fibroids. I also have a condition called poly-cystic ovaries syndrome. For all intensive purposes, I should not have been able to get pregnant as easily as I did without the help of doctors. However, I have two beautiful children for whom I am eternally grateful. I had a miscarriage before our son Kevin was conceived and it is believed that I had another one when he was about a year old. I say "believed" because I never went to the doctor to confirm the second miscarriage. I couldn't bare it. 

My husband is a musician and we were going from place to place in his home town promoting his first album in the fall of 1998. During one of the sets I started having excruciating abdominal pain and I remember thinking to myself that I was going to have a difficult week navigating shows, church and "womanly issues." After the shows for that day were done, we stopped at my parents hotel because we hadn't seen them. By that time, I could no longer keep my brave face on, my pain was almost unbearable. The details of how things transpired will always be a little "fuzzy" for me because I was lightheaded. To me, that bathroom was reminiscent of a scene from CSI. It was messy, gory, painful and heart breaking.

My mother and my husband didn't bat an eye. They cleaned me and the bathroom completely up and never minced words with me--a very tearful and bewildered young woman who had no idea what was really happening. That day will forever be etched in my memory, though because I experienced two kinds of love. My mom went into a fierce, mother-bear, protective kind of love that wanted to reassure me that I was okay. My husband, on the other hand, took a different approach. He upheld me with a quiet strength and never let me go until we were back in our own room, when he laid me down and let me rest. I was shaken and fearful that this would be my life during my child bearing years, afraid I'd never conceive again. 

Life and love can be just as messy as that awful day. We raise our children, build our careers, seek higher education and grow ministries. And often, living can get in the way of loving. When I asked some friends their concept of love, some gave generic answers while others had meaningful and heartfelt answers and sadly, there were a few who didn't know what to say at all. I submit that if we are not careful, the latter will be the epitaph of many marriages.

Beloved, its easy to allow ourselves to turn our backs on each other in marriage, especially when there has been damage done to the bond. We learn to live for the children or concentrate on breadwinning. The focus of passion, love, marriage...its lost.

Ephesians 5:25--Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church...I love this scripture because it speaks to us about "giving up" something for someone whom you love, just as Christ did at Calvary for us. If you find yourself in that 'living versus loving chasm' don't worry it's not necessarily irreparable. Get in the trenches and get ready to go to work--seek wise counsel, go on dates, spend time talking...it doesn't have to be too late.

Our Prayer:

Lord, You said in Your Word that it wasn't good for man to be alone. You created us to live with and love one another. Help us to remember that love and passion that we felt for one another in the beginning stages of our relationship. We want to be in Your will and find happiness in the mate that You gave to us. Amen

Thursday, May 30, 2013

Soul Blinders


Webster's dictionary describes a distraction as something that prevents someone from giving full attention to something else. It also describes a distraction as a diversion.

In life we often experience many diversions, something that causes us to lose focus on the important things. Horse trainers often add blinders to the bridle of race horses because they believe these blinders keep the horse focused on what is in front of him, and encourage him to pay attention to the race rather than other distractions, such as crowds. As believers, we know that Christ and our relationship with Him, witnessing and bringing lost souls into the Family of God is our goal. But we also have to live life. And recently my life, my heart and my mind have been filled with "things". When this happens, it's difficult for me to hear God's voice. 

I had an "aha moment" sitting at my kitchen table the other morning--I felt overwhelmed and began to cry. I had no idea where the tears were coming from or why, but boy did they flow. It was at that moment that I heard the voice of The Lord, clearer than I had in months! I began to pray..."Father, I have no words to speak. Only tears to cry for this lost and lonely feeling that I have deep in my heart." He said to me, "I have been waiting for you to come back to our meeting place...good morning!" As I sat and communed with God, I knew what that longing was about. I love shoes and if I could, I would fill every empty space in my closet with a new pair (digressing...a little but stay with me). Whenever I feel a "need" in my life and I can't figure it out, eventually I go to shoes. And oh my goodness, I buy beautiful shoes! And for a moment, I have my happy back. But it never lasts longer than the time it takes for me to find the next bargain.

Friend, The Lord allowed me to see that I had been filling the void in my heart with things that would never satisfy. Spending time alone with God connects us to His Spirit, thereby allowing us the opportunity to know Him in a personal way. Only THAT can satisfy what feels like an empty chasm in our hearts. The Psalmist said it best..."As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, my God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God" (Psalm 42:1-2). 
I didn't realize that I had been attempting to fill the loneliness and longing that I felt in my heart with things, I found that my real refuge was in spending time with God. God doesn't leave us without direction or help. He gave us His Word, the Bible, to direct our thoughts, behaviors, hearts, minds and souls - to be our soul-blinders! 

Here's Our Prayer:
Father in Heaven, each of us can find a reason to do a great many things to satisfy the physicality's of loneliness and brokenness. But, we want to fill that space with You. In those awkward moments when things just don't seem to be going as planned, remind us that You are here and that You're listening, speaking and waiting patiently for us to meet with You. Thank You Lord for never turning Your back on us, even when we are not cognizant of the fact that You are there. Amen